My Muse

The other night I was hungering
for a thread to write on, off of
which to riff. So I woke my muse. I
said to her, I said, "Look. Muse.
Could it ever be, I mean just
supposing, that an honest thing
would not last?" Her face contorted.
She responded, "Well, overcoming
my aversion to your atrocious way
with words, I will say that honest
things generally last. Honesty is
not the only needed attribute for
longevity, however." I asked,
"What else need there be?" She said,
"You know as well as I do."
"I really don't," I protested.
"That must be," she explained,
"why you find yourself in such
a piss-poor position." I wondered,
"What must be?" Muse responded
with a bit of barb to her tone,
"The fact that you can't think
what else there must be." I
shrugged my shoulders in ignorance.
"Sex! Dumb ass," she screamed.
"I can't believe you called me
down here for this. I mean, I was
finally getting a good night's sleep,
and you had to ruin it with your
stupid, 'What else is there aside
from honesty.' Sex, fool. You can
have everything good that this
world has to offer, but if you
don't have sex, you've got nothing
really." I nodded. "Yes, I've
heard that somewhere before."
"Yeah, some Indian guy said it
a couple of thousand years ago.
But I'm the one who said it
just now! And you should keep it
close in mind. You. Sleep
ruiner! I'm going back to bed
now. Don't even think about
bothering me again unless you
have a REAL question." With that,
my muse was gone. And I was not
one wit wiser. I'm starting to
think I should find a new muse.
Sex. As if I didn't know.

(2008)